Friday, May 6, 2011

What Was the Speed at Which Jesus Walked on Water?

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Grigori Perelman, pictured above, famous for having "turned out million dollar prizes, choosing instead the life of a hermit on the edge of indigence," claims to have calculated it — Russian math genius holds keys to universe. "He walked like on dry land, so I had to calculate the speed he needed to move in order not to sink," said the mathematician.

"Emptiness is everywhere and it can be calculated, which gives us a great opportunity. I know how to control the universe. So tell me, why should I run for a million?"

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Omnes Sancti et Sanctæ Coreæ, orate pro nobis.