Monday, November 15, 2010

Dear Delphi on Divorce

Taki's Magazine has an advice columnist who "has been helping people since circa 580 B.C.;" this week, she answers a question from "Ex-Anxiety in Dublin" — Flirty Baristas, Amorous Exes, Freeloading Friends, and Feeling Fat.

The questioner, who has "five children, [and has] been married to [her] husband for upward of 10 years... can’t stop thinking about [her] high-school boyfriend," with whom she just "had a really flirty chat" and asks, "Should I leave my husband?" Delphina Boncompagni Ludovisi response:
    No, I do not think you should leave your husband. Good reasons to consider leaving your husband are: He is a homosexual and brings his lover to dinner pretending he is a coworker; he is sleeping with your 18-year-old daughter’s best friend; or you have been cheating on him with his best friend every chance you get. I could tell you, if you think you are looking cute enough, feeling flirty enough, and have the energy, call him up and see where it goes. But I wouldn’t; flirty chat is not a good enough reason to turn your family upside-down. Divorce is not a good idea and should be illegal except under very extreme circumstances. This idea that you have a right to be happy at any cost, that life is supposed to be fun, gratifying, and full of new experiences every second of every day, is a bunch of bull sold to the masses by the politicians and entertainers who want to keep you stupid, fat, and unhappy. You decided to get married and have five children of your own free will; now you have responsibilities, not choices. You sound more bored than unhappy, so look for a new hobby before you go looking for a new hubby.
I gave the same advice to a friends of mine who had taken things further and requited and unrequited love of his from high school; the only problem being that he was married to someone else and had two children. He's still with his lawfully wedded wife, and called me a few years later to thank me, saying that I was the only one of all his friends to give the right advice.

Labels: , ,

Bookmark and Share


Blogger Enbrethiliel said...


You've got to love an advice columnist who tells it the way it is!

I still remember recoiling in disgust at footage from an interview of Melanie Griffith. She was asked why she had decided to leave her first husband for Antonio Banderas. She said something to the effect of: "You can live your life putting everybody else first or you can do what you know is right."


Remember that by "everybody else" she meant a family she already had, children included.

3:55 PM  
Blogger The Western Confucian said...

My friend's experience was the same. Everybody, except me, told him, he had to do what was right for him, him, him, children and wife be damned!

I'm not sure if American cultural imperialism reached as far to your country as to include "The Most Important Person" series: "The most important person in the whole wide world is you and you hardly even know you." We also had The Kingdom of Could Be You.

Lord Almighty! I haven't thought of these programs in years! I feel like I'm in the process of self-deprogramming, waking up from some dystopia. As my reader "danightman" has has said, they don't class it "TV Programming" for nothing!

10:59 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home

Omnes Sancti et Sanctæ Coreæ, orate pro nobis.