Father Francis Tan Tiande, Requiem æternam...

News of the passing of a priest "held in high esteem as a martyr by all the faithful in Guangzhou diocese" — Fr Francis Tan Tiande, a joyful witness after 30 years in a labour camp, dies. An excerpt from his writing:

In the 30 years I spent in the north-east, farming was my main occupation. Each year, when spring came we had to fertilise a field that was as hard as steel [because of the extreme cold]. We used pickaxes to break the ground. Once the ground was loose, we would water it and plant the seeds. Today, when I describe all this, it does not all seem so bad. In reality we were underfed. All that work was beyond our capacity and each minute was an agony . . .

People might wonder how I could survive such terrible conditions. For those who do not believe, it is an enigma with no solution. For those who believe it is God’s will. Life is man’s most precious gift. I must take care of this gift so as not be ungrateful. Hence I ate wild herbs to survive, and tree bark . . . Such were the conditions I lived in that I experienced my fellow inmates’ brutal actions . . . That pain was even worse than hunger. I wanted to run in the fields, shouting "Where are you God?" . . . I cannot remember how many times I wanted to end it all, but at the crucial moment I saw Jesus on the cross looking at me with those merciful eyes . . . and telling me, "Man of little faith! Do you doubt perhaps that I love you?"

Even during the years when showing a religious symbol was severely punished, I did not stop doing the sign of the cross among the prisoners. I was afraid that I might forget that everything came from His hands, that everything was a token of love, that everything was given to me so that I might be someone who could love. I was afraid that I might end up thinking that there was something I might not thank the Lord for, that I might end up being ashamed of Him, that I might think someone or something was stronger than Him. That "sign" cost me several punishments . . . but I had to preserve my dignity as a believer in order not to find myself without strength.